Help

[Mgd35]

Thank you for the information.I really appreciate it.
Mark

[mensfe_admin]

Our pleasure Mark glad to be of assistance........ take care.

[mensfe_admin]

Hi Richard - thank you for your powerful story, I trust you will recieve a lot of replies which I hope enables you through this difficult time.
In addition to this, you may find the one-on-one telephone support line which is available on Monday evenings helpful. 

[ptravis]

Hi Richard,
You have come to the right place mate, though lets face it none of us would have wanted it this way!

I have not had your history and I am sorry to hear just how down you have been. Mind you I have no sperm either so still have to come to terms with the same issues. It has taken a while but all I can say is that you have to build a new set of rules for your life. The old ones clearly are not doing it for you so you have got to bin them. That's the way to start - sure it takes a while but its the only way to go. My suggestion for now would be to keep dialogue going here - give them a call on Monday and have a chat with them. Then start building relationships, thats whats kept me going, I have found a woman who loves me and we have been together a good while now. She's more reliable than my sperm are I can tell you!!!
Sorry I can't wave a wand and sort it for you, but keep at it mate, you'll get there..

[drichards]

Hi Richard - everyone, I can equate with your downward spiral when life seems to have little meaning, not being able to perform and being terrified of starting a relationship with the opposit sex - what a lonley place in the corner that is.............
Well -glad you found somewhere to be able to at least tell your story. Hopefully this will be the turning point knowing you are not as alone as you thought you were. For me there was no quick and easy resolve as Travis said no magic to make it all go away.
I found the thing that helped me was by forcing myself to join a sailing club, I suppose it could have been any club, something I could belong to..... but sailing was the one I chose. I had always liked sailing as a child and although it was really hard making the effort it turned out to be the best thing I had done in years. I got involved in the weekend activities with like minded people and things proggressed from there. Slowly I began to get my confidence back which allowed me to face some of my fears, most importantly finding out what was happening to my dangly bits. Well it was bad news but I got through, to cut a very long story short I now have two kids with the women I love through donated sperm - A long journey to get here but very pleased I did not throw in the towel when I was in that corner.

Good luck - hang on in there - Richard     

[mensfe_admin]

Hi -it sounds very frustrating that they appeared to have mislaid your case notes,

however most importantly the best advice you could receive is from your consultant, we suggest you make an appointment with the clinic to have a one to one revue. This will give you clarification of your treatment options and what these options would entail i.e. semen analysis, surgical sperm retrieval etc..

"Occasional mature motile sperm" sounds promising this would have been prior to freeze, so under the circumstances you have expleained it appears quite good - however post thaw is the crucial time.

Regards age, under normal circumstances after the age of 45 years is when "some" males sperm starts to decrease.

Clearly you need to discuss with your clinic the monotory side of your sperm storage to retain your options, and in conjunction with this we would recommend that you also seek a revue with the clinic to discuss all the points you have raised.     

[richard]

Many thanks for all your help.

[mensfe_admin]

Please contact your local Samaritons or if you feel appropriate telephone the Mensfe number you have previously telephoned.

[mpepperell]

Hi Richard, I guess that you may well be still watching, as you made a very powerful, but ambiguous posting............... "not worth carrying on....."

Well I am very sorry to hear that you have got to this point.  I do not wish to patronise you, but when we give up, it can be a real release, and by that I mean it can be a sort of acceptance, and from being driven in one direction, we become free to make choices. 

This may not be a very popular thing to say on this site, but fertility aint everything, there are the living, the ones we do have, and are available for us to love... and be loved by, who may have become ignored in this quest for "justice" and fairness to have children.  We can now trun to them and begin to rebuild new lives.

So if you have let go of one hope, then I pray that you can see it as a point of new beiginings, and move on.

However, at the end of the day, it is your choice and if you are in despair, then as the posting before said, there are many out there who are profesionally compassionate and may be able to help you through the dark days............ use them mate.

wish you well


Mark

[Eric]

I am aware this may be a little late but there has been a lot in the news about fertility tourism - I think this term is dreadful - who do they think they are classing we that have to go abroad for fertility treatment because of the long waiting lists in the UK - We are patients - patients - patients not ****** tourists..............
It makes my blood boil, anyway on a lighter note my wife and I have a wonderful  daughter who we treasure and only made possible by the proffessional, compassionate help we recieved on an overseas egg donation programmme.
GOOD ON YOU PROFFESSIONALS WHO AT LEAST GIVE US A CHANCE.